Even more Roc d'Azur

Almost a week has past since my Roc experience! I wanted to write down my experiences sooner but was waiting for the time and the pictures.

Last Friday was my day and I was very nervous....being nervous is normal for me before a race, but the pressure was on even more. I had stated the whole year through I had wanted to compete for a podium spot, when three weeks before the race my knee looked like football and I could hardly walk of pain. The fear of major damage didn't do my confidence much good either. And when I was riding on the Roc trails, 3 days before the race and could not keep up with my host and guide, I felt trouble....''I'm not ready'' ''My training has not been sufficient'' and more of those things went through my mind.

So, when on Friday I stood in the back rows of the second wave with my brother, I was relieved. It was an anonymous start; no way that riding away in the first kilometers would be possible, with all these people in front of me and no way I would be able to ride a fair result.

Off I went, said goodbye to my brother in the first climb when he passed me and felt the fire return when I was passing lots of people....men.....during that first climb. A technical climb that I had studied in July. I new what to expect and knew how to beat the sucker. All went well. The first descent was a big traffic jam and I knew that a descent time was, again, out of the question, with this kind of trouble during the first descent.

And sure enough; when the next climb doomed and with a little steep bump to pass on technique, before attacking the climb, I again was stopped by someone not able to pass the obstacle. Getting back on the bike was going to be hell and the rythm would be jeopardised.

Sure enough, I struggled on. I knew the terrain and passed lots of guys, on rythm and my power, but even for me the juice ran out, for the dead simple reason that it was hot, that I had not ridden under these circumstances and in this terrain for 2 years and because of the ongoing stopping and starting due to jams....after 2.5 hours I had had it and was close to quitting.

Do not get me wrong....the new descent was awesome and I felt that I could finally use the bike for what it has been made for. This was pure heaven, but also brutal reality. My lungs were burning and my legs moved on in a fine power mode. But I had had it and was very, very close to getting off, when I passed the house of my hosts. Enough is enough I thought; the knees are holding out, I can still ride technical runs, but this is too hard....

For some reason I moved on, thought that finishing is the least I can do. I don't want to dissapoint myself, nor the people who have helped me and who support me. I have to finish. When I finally crossed the line with a 45 minutes laps of my best time I felt dissapointed. 45 Minutes longer than usual is too much, even with the traffic jams....My front tire was flat and I had struggled in the last two descents were the flat tire pushed me straight, where I was supposed to turn a sharp corner......ai ai ai ai.....I just made it.

In the end, after a hard day on the bike and a short swim in the sea afterwards and thunderous clouds to end the day....I had finished 7th in my category. 7th.....who would have thought!

Roc 2010...here I come!